Finally Finding My Fade
GUYS! It’s official! After three years of humming and hawing I FINALLY CAST ON MY FIND YOUR FADE SHAWL! Granted I didn’t get very far but we’re not focusing on that right now. I committed to colours, I wound yarn and I cast on. That’s a huge deal for me. Do you know how many iterations there has been of this shawl? I think the only other thing I’ve spent more time deciding on is my tattoo… and I still haven’t got that as yet. That’s another story. Ash and I have been talking about that for years and she’s convinced this is the year for her. I want a tattoo but I also want craft supplies and my want of craft supplies generally trumps my want of everything else.
Now that I’m writing this, I realise that really is the real problem. I always thought the problem was that I couldn’t decide what tattoo I wanted to get but the truth of the matter is that I decided on my tattoo a long time ago. I’ve always wanted the quote, “Where your treasure is, there will your heart be also,” which some might know from the Gospel of Mathew and most will know from Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. I have to give HP the nod because that was the first time I had read that verse and it resonated deeply and immediately with me. Out of all of the options, it’s the one that I’ve come back to time and again. The real decision hasn’t been what tattoo I want but what I want more: the tattoo or pretty much everything else that I choose to spend money on. Wow. What a weird moment of clarity. I also have no idea what that means for my tattoo dreams.
Anyway, getting back to my shawl. For those of you who have been hanging out with me for a while have probably seen various versions of this picture in the past. The problem has always been that I couldn’t decide on cool or warm colours because I could not decide what part of the year that I would end up wearing this thing. The fact that I’m not a natural shawl wearer also weighed heavily on me. It’s definitely a lot of time to put into a project that may or may not get used effectively. I mean, I always want to wear shawls but can never get them to sit quite right when they’re on. I think the big boobs, and big hair throw everything off. Still. I’ve been coveting this shawl for so long I really believe I just need to get it out of my system.
Remarkably it was shopping for another craft supply that brought some clarity to this shawl. I recently learned that the key to shopping for craft supplies is learning to spend your money effectively. Like, never shop at Michael’s without a coupon, but also, only buy what you’re actually going to use. Recently I’ve taken to shopping on Facebook Marketplace for craft supplies and if you’ve never done it before, proceed with caution. The deals you find are outrageous and highly addictive.
The other day, I found a lady online selling the most beautiful colours of thread. I mean, every colour under the sun and it was such a good deal that it was hard not to scoop them all up and come home with them. Then, channelling my inner Marie Kondo, I realised that there was no point going home with all of them when all of the fabric that I habitually pick up are navy, lilac and pink. Also, I don’t know if you’ve heard this quote of hers but Marie says, “the question of what you want to own is actually the question of how you want to live your life.” Every time I read this quote I want to sell everything and run away. Talking about tattoo’s, I should get this quote inked on my thumbs and the likelihood is that it would dramatically cut down on the amazon purchases.
What these lessons taught me is I was seriously overthinking this shawl. The truth is, those are my colours: blue, lilac and pink. I don’t need anything else. If I stick with the wheel house I’m comfortable with, I can’t possibly go wrong. It also means that I've incorporated a couple of my other favourite dyers from my yarn stash: Hedgehog Fibers (pictured above) and Riverside Studios (the pink and purple right behinds it).
Another critical lesson I remembered: comparison really is the thief of joy. Even though I kept coming back to the colours I like, I couldn’t help comparing them with everyone else’s Fade and finding my own lacking. I’ve decided that I want the shawl more than I want to squat with indecision just because someone else’s shawl might be prettier than my own.
So here we are in life: a Fade shawl finally cast on and two sweater WIP’s. My Soldotna is temporarily in a time out and I’m focusing on my Soot Bloom tee and this shawl. I’m also pretending that after the month of June I’m not taking on any new craft projects. All evidence is that this is a lie but since nothing is currently planned I can pretend that it might be true. Yesterday I had my very first knit night at my condo building. I was nervous that no one would show up but three people actually came! I’m hoping this means that my knitting productivity will go up a bit but I guess only time will tell.
That’s it for me for this week. Come back next week and see what I’m up to! Until then, PEACE to you and yours and, as always, happy knitting!